The other day a new guy asked me, “Can you give me some tips?” I think he wanted me to give him one of those top ten lists, you know, the ten simple things you need to do to be a great manager. There is such a thing as a stupid question.
If you’re not naturally inclined to lead others there is no step-by-step guide that will work for you. Of course, like anything else, a business manager can get better with practice. There are techniques and approaches time teaches the patient learner. I guess you can learn some of these techniques by watching others or reading or going to school. But checking off boxes of some other guy’s list is not the way to get good at anything. And the guy who gave you the list is a phony who just gave you some other phony’s list.
I told the new guy all of this, and ended by telling him, “Just be yourself.” I felt stupid saying this, and he looked at me like I was a talking Hallmark card. Then I told him to, “Lead with your heart, not your mind.” If I were him I probably would have puked.
Anyway, I don’t know what to tell you or him. I don’t think anyone does. You have to have a natural inclination for doing what you want to do and then you have to work hard at it for a long time and figure it out for yourself.